“When they called me about this job, I was just like whatever, I’m already teaching cute little kids where I live in California… why would I want to fly out to Pough-whatsitsface to teach whiny little rich kids? And that’s when I was told that my favorite actress of all time, MERYL STREEP, graduated from here! And I was like NO WAY! And they were like YES WAY! And I was like NO WAY! And they were like YES WAY! And I was like NO WAY!... You get the idea. So I was totally in. And then they offered me like $30,000 a year and I was like psh. Please, I’m worth like a zillion dollars, GIMME GIMME MORE! And I busted out my pole and did some amazing moves, like in that awesome music video I released a few months ago, you know, the one where I’m almost topless? No, not the sex tape. The music video WITH THE POLE and ripped nets! And so they offered me $31,000 and I was like SOLD! I mean, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do when she only gets to spend $1500 a week!”
| SPRiNKLES’s Take: Indeed. |
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