It is my pleasure to announce that that position has recently been filled, according to several infallible independent sources. Blog9 has verified their accuracy with those in high-tier administrative positions (aka those in the know), and has been given permission to reveal to you exclusively the name of this person.
Britney Spears.
According to those on the panel to search for the new dance professor, Britney was the only logical choice:
"Through her dance moves, Britney communicates messages and feelings powerfully, boldly and convincingly. She has a special gift for energizing, empowering and inspiring the person experiencing her art, so that this person feels involved in the artistic process. Britney's performances are thrilling invitations to a shared emotion, and you can feel her personality immediately next to you with all its multi-layered charm and sophisticated sweetness. We wanted to bring this vibe to the dance program at Vassar, and we are thrilled that Ms. Spears and especially her father, Jamie, are so enthusiastic about this."
Britney will begin teaching in the upcoming fall semester, and will offer at least four sections of classes. Two classes already confirmed are Chair Dancing 101 and Belly Dancing 401 (for advanced dancers only).
| SPRiNKLES’s Take: OH NO THEY DIDN’T!!! I am ridiculously out of shape, but I’m hitting the gym tomorrow – her class on chair dancing is gonna be the first one on my pre-registration form! |
2 comments:
i know you're trying to be funny, but you kinda failed
i agree.
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